Nightmare for Every Mum in Dubai : Tantrums

mum in dubai

All children throw tantrums sometimes

Temper Tantrums

I don’t think there is any mum in Dubai or anywhere else who hasn’t dealt with temper tantrums. One thing that parenting teaches you is patience and this comes in very handy when dealing with tantrums. A child can throw a tantrum anywhere anytime, even at places where you think they might have fun. Some parents find it very hard to deal with the tantrums. If you are one of those parents, this post is for you.

Understanding Why Kids Have Tantrums

Kids have just as much personality and individuality as an adult. They long for the same things, love, security, comfort, independence, etc. as adults. But they are dependent upon their elders or parents to fulfil most of their needs. When the adults fail to understand their needs or provide for them, a tantrum can happen. Being tired, sleepy, hungry, thirsty or simply bored are the most common causes of tantrums. They can also happen when children want something and cannot get it, or want their parents to do something which they refuse to do. All of us remember whining, crying, screaming, kicking, hitting, etc.  from our children for a toy or a candy that was refused or not provided. Tantrums can be annoying at the least. No parent wants to be spotted with a child that is screaming and crying in public. It is embarrassing.

Tips for Mum in Dubai to Control Tantrums

Though sometimes, it may seem impossible to pacify a child in the middle of a tantrum, it can be done. The best way to control tantrums is to try and prevent it. Make sure your child is not hungry or thirsty. Try not to go out when the child is hungry, tired or sleepy. Keep the child occupied so he or she is not bored. Always keep some snacks and a drink to give to your child. Make sure there are snacks and toys within reach of your child so he/she doesn’t have to rely upon you all the time. If despite this, the child still throws a tantrum, you need to deal with it as soon as possible.

Pay attention to the child: If the child begins to show signs of going into a tantrum, pay attention to his/her needs. This almost always helps to diffuse the situation.

Distract the Child: When a child is whiny or crying try to distract them by giving them some task to do. If you are out shopping, ask them to look for things you want in the store. This will keep the child occupied and kill the tantrum in the bud.

Reward the Child: If a child wants something and you do not mind buying it, tell the child that you will get it for them provided they behave while you finish your work. Always provide incentives for good behaviour.

Give them some control: It is good to let the child have some control over little things. Give them choices such as – Do you want to wear the pink pyjamas or the yellow one? Do you want cocoa milk or vanilla milk?

Do not make it into a battle of wills: Don’t be overbearing. Listen to your child and try to reason. If it works, well and good, if it doesn’t then sometimes it is best to give in and walk away. Never respond to a tantrum with anger or frustration. Patience and self-control is the key here.

Ignore them: Sometimes ignoring is the best policy. Warn your child to behave and if they do not listen, then ignore them. Walk off if you are in a public place leaving the child behind. At home, go to another room leaving the child alone. When ignored, the tantrums disappear pretty quickly.

It is best to take your child to a quiet place to calm down. This is especially true for tantrums in public places. Being away from the public eye helps get the anger and frustration out.

Mum in Dubai Looking for a Nanny

mum in dubai

Spending quality time together is important

The Benefit of Being a Mum in Dubai

One great thing, that every mum in Dubai loves about living in here is the ease of finding domestic help. Raising a family of two young ones on one’s own is not an easy thing. As a mum in Dubai, I have found that babysitters and nannies too are easy to find. Moreover, it is also a lot cheaper to hire help than it is in Europe. Here, in Dubai, I can afford to have a full-time nanny to help me with my two little ones. Had I been back home in Italy, I would have had to think twice or get someone from my family to help me out.

Being Mum of Two is Busy

Every mother with two little ones knows just how busy it can be to look after two young children. With my younger one now teething and demanding constant attention, I had little time to spend with my older child. A few days of not enough attention, he grew restless and started throwing tantrums. I could not cope up with the demands of both so I decided to look for a nanny.

Finding hel4u.today in Dubai

Another young mother living in our building has a great nanny so I decided to ask her for some recommendations for babysitting in Dubai. She introduced me to help4u.today an online resource for some of the best babysitters and Nannies in Dubai. It is easy to use and what’s more, you can compare prices and services of various babysitting agencies in your area before hiring. The service is supported by a smartphone app which allows the user to easily monitor and leave instructions for the nanny. I looked up the service as soon as I got home and searched for a babysitter or a nanny in my area. There were several agencies listed there and I picked up one after comparing the prices of all the options.

Nanny is Such a Help!

I scheduled to interview a candidate the next day. The person who arrived was a woman in her early thirties. She was an Indian who had accompanied her husband to Dubai and had a valid work visa to work in Dubai. This was a big help as I did not want to have a Nanny who was working illegally. The woman had two children of her own, both in their teens and old enough for her to work. I asked her for references and she gave me the details of two families for whom she babysat occasionally.

Next, it was time to check the references from the families and I got a great feedback from them. Then, I introduced her to both my children. My son took to her immediately and my daughter did not mind a new face in the house. I explained what I wanted her to do and asked her to start immediately. She learned the ropes of my household within a few days and took care of the needs of both my children. It was a relief to have someone helping me out so I could have time for myself and my children.

I am no longer exhausted all the time, thanks to help4u.today. My husband and I can now safely leave our kids home and go out for a dinner or a movie without any worries.

If you need to know more about help4u.today and how it worked for me contact me and I will be glad to help you.

Are You A Pushy Mum in Dubai? Check Yourself

mum in Dubai

Don’t push your child into hiding

There Might Be a Pushy Mum in Dubai Lurking Here

Apparently, we are all pushy to some extent. If we weren’t then probably we would not succeed in life at all. It is good to be a bit pushy at times and under certain circumstances but not all the time. When it comes to our kids, we have to know where to draw a line and not push them too hard. Being competitive is good but when it starts to consume you and take over all pragmatic thought, it is time to take a rain check and see whether you are a too pushy a Mum in Dubai.

Signs of Pushy Parents

There are certain signs that pushy parents display. Go through the list to gauge whether you are a pushy parent or not.

  • If you want to be in your child’s teacher’s good books always, you are a pushy Mum in Dubai.
  • Trying to be over familiar with school staff and teachers, especially in the earshot of other parents makes you a very pushy Mom.
  • You invite your child’s friends over and let them eat what they want to be in their favor, then you are a pushy Mom.
  • Secretly check on the progress of your child’s classmates to see what they are doing, you are being a pushy Mum in Dubai.
  • Always volunteering at your child’s school in order to be popular with the school staff, you are a pushy Mom.
  • Constantly force your child to practice so as to be the best in class makes you a pushy mom.
  • You always want you and your child to be the center of attention so do stuff to attract attention. You certainly are a pushy Mum in Dubai.
  • You like to boast of your child’s abilities existing or non-existing makes you a pushy Mum in Dubai.
  • You cannot bear the thought of another child beating yours – you definitely are a pushy Mum.

Where the problem Lies

The highly competitive world today makes it very difficult for anyone not to be pushy. The parents think that if they do not push their children hard, they will not succeed in life. Success has become the most important factor in life. People believe that getting good grades, staying top of the class, getting into the best school and college, securing a good job, etc. are the gauge of success. All our materialistic achievements are considered success. But success is not just that. It is also being a good and happy person.

In our race to succeed in the materialistic world, we forget that our children need to enjoy their childhood. Carefree play and freedom to pursue their own interests in more important than forcing them into a mould. Also, not all children are equal in abilities. Some are better at academics while the others excel at sports. Our endeavor as parents should be to help them enhance their natural abilities and interest rather than pushing them into doing things that they are incapable of doing.

Accepting your child as he or she may be is the biggest gift we can give our children. Being too pushy a Mum in Dubai may only lead to resentment and alienation.

Pushy Mum in Dubai-Don’t Want to Be that

mum in dubai

There are no failures.

Not A Pleasant Swimming Lesson with Another Mum in Dubai

When I set out that day, I never thought that the day would turn so weird and I would be so affected by this incident. What I had thought of as a pleasant swimming lesson with my son and his friends turned ugly because of a pushy mum in Dubai.

I had only heard of such mothers who just push their kids, but this was firsthand experience and I have to say I am still unable to understand the need for it.

Helping A Mum in Dubai

So, I had taken my son and three of his friends for their swimming lessons. I had been doing this for a while now as I had the time and liked to spend it watching the kids. I had started only with my son, but soon two other women from our apartment building asked me to take their children too as they could not do so themselves. I agreed as I knew the two women and was friends with them and whated to be a helpful mum in Dubai. Also, I wanted to help out.

As it Happened

We went down to the swimming pool for the lessons as usual. My son and the three other kids were with me. Two of the children were siblings. There were other children and parents around the pool too helping their children master the art of swimming. The two brothers were older than my son and the other kid by a couple of years or so. Since they all played often together I knew them well. But apparently not too well.

The children got into the pool and started their exercises and practicing their strokes. They were all progressing well. My son and the other boy were quick learners and had already started to paddle without the tubes. The two brothers were taking their time and still used the tubes to paddle around.

Pushy Mother Descends

Suddenly the mother of the two brothers descended upon us. No sooner did the kids see their mother, their faces fell. I wondered about it but did not think much until later. She stood watching the four boys and when she realized that her kids were behind the others she got out of control. She started screaming at her boys calling them stupid, incompetent and to try harder. The more she screamed the more the boys cowered. The commotion disturbed the other children in the pool and a parent came up to ask the lady to calm down and give her children time and space. The pushy mother just turned around and screamed at the poor man. She shouted “I don’t want my kids to be second to anyone. They will come first or die trying.” We were all stunned at her outburst. A few others tried to intervene but looking at her vehemence gave up. Most of the parents got their children out of the pool and went away. A good decision as it was not a pleasant thing to watch. Her sons were cowering while she hovered over them forcing them to swim without the tube like my son was doing.

Heart Breaking

It was heartbreaking to watch her two boys trying their best to please the mother and there was nothing they could do that was right. I too could not watch their little faces all dejected and sad anymore. I got my son and his friend out of the pool and went away.

I heard later, that she stood there a long time forcing the kids to try harder till the security came and asked her to leave with her sons. I heard the children were exhausted and crying by the time they came out of the pool. I had never experienced anything like this before. The woman had been pleasant and friendly but I had no idea she could be such a pushy Mum in Dubai.

Why Do it?

The incident left a deep mark on my psyche as well as my son’s. He asked me if I would do the same to him if he failed at something. I hugged him tight and told him that I would love him despite everything. Anyway, there are no failures in life, there are only learning opportunities.

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