Are You A Pushy Mum in Dubai? Check Yourself

mum in Dubai

Don’t push your child into hiding

There Might Be a Pushy Mum in Dubai Lurking Here

Apparently, we are all pushy to some extent. If we weren’t then probably we would not succeed in life at all. It is good to be a bit pushy at times and under certain circumstances but not all the time. When it comes to our kids, we have to know where to draw a line and not push them too hard. Being competitive is good but when it starts to consume you and take over all pragmatic thought, it is time to take a rain check and see whether you are a too pushy a Mum in Dubai.

Signs of Pushy Parents

There are certain signs that pushy parents display. Go through the list to gauge whether you are a pushy parent or not.

  • If you want to be in your child’s teacher’s good books always, you are a pushy Mum in Dubai.
  • Trying to be over familiar with school staff and teachers, especially in the earshot of other parents makes you a very pushy Mom.
  • You invite your child’s friends over and let them eat what they want to be in their favor, then you are a pushy Mom.
  • Secretly check on the progress of your child’s classmates to see what they are doing, you are being a pushy Mum in Dubai.
  • Always volunteering at your child’s school in order to be popular with the school staff, you are a pushy Mom.
  • Constantly force your child to practice so as to be the best in class makes you a pushy mom.
  • You always want you and your child to be the center of attention so do stuff to attract attention. You certainly are a pushy Mum in Dubai.
  • You like to boast of your child’s abilities existing or non-existing makes you a pushy Mum in Dubai.
  • You cannot bear the thought of another child beating yours – you definitely are a pushy Mum.

Where the problem Lies

The highly competitive world today makes it very difficult for anyone not to be pushy. The parents think that if they do not push their children hard, they will not succeed in life. Success has become the most important factor in life. People believe that getting good grades, staying top of the class, getting into the best school and college, securing a good job, etc. are the gauge of success. All our materialistic achievements are considered success. But success is not just that. It is also being a good and happy person.

In our race to succeed in the materialistic world, we forget that our children need to enjoy their childhood. Carefree play and freedom to pursue their own interests in more important than forcing them into a mould. Also, not all children are equal in abilities. Some are better at academics while the others excel at sports. Our endeavor as parents should be to help them enhance their natural abilities and interest rather than pushing them into doing things that they are incapable of doing.

Accepting your child as he or she may be is the biggest gift we can give our children. Being too pushy a Mum in Dubai may only lead to resentment and alienation.

Pushy Mum in Dubai-Don’t Want to Be that

mum in dubai

There are no failures.

Not A Pleasant Swimming Lesson with Another Mum in Dubai

When I set out that day, I never thought that the day would turn so weird and I would be so affected by this incident. What I had thought of as a pleasant swimming lesson with my son and his friends turned ugly because of a pushy mum in Dubai.

I had only heard of such mothers who just push their kids, but this was firsthand experience and I have to say I am still unable to understand the need for it.

Helping A Mum in Dubai

So, I had taken my son and three of his friends for their swimming lessons. I had been doing this for a while now as I had the time and liked to spend it watching the kids. I had started only with my son, but soon two other women from our apartment building asked me to take their children too as they could not do so themselves. I agreed as I knew the two women and was friends with them and whated to be a helpful mum in Dubai. Also, I wanted to help out.

As it Happened

We went down to the swimming pool for the lessons as usual. My son and the three other kids were with me. Two of the children were siblings. There were other children and parents around the pool too helping their children master the art of swimming. The two brothers were older than my son and the other kid by a couple of years or so. Since they all played often together I knew them well. But apparently not too well.

The children got into the pool and started their exercises and practicing their strokes. They were all progressing well. My son and the other boy were quick learners and had already started to paddle without the tubes. The two brothers were taking their time and still used the tubes to paddle around.

Pushy Mother Descends

Suddenly the mother of the two brothers descended upon us. No sooner did the kids see their mother, their faces fell. I wondered about it but did not think much until later. She stood watching the four boys and when she realized that her kids were behind the others she got out of control. She started screaming at her boys calling them stupid, incompetent and to try harder. The more she screamed the more the boys cowered. The commotion disturbed the other children in the pool and a parent came up to ask the lady to calm down and give her children time and space. The pushy mother just turned around and screamed at the poor man. She shouted “I don’t want my kids to be second to anyone. They will come first or die trying.” We were all stunned at her outburst. A few others tried to intervene but looking at her vehemence gave up. Most of the parents got their children out of the pool and went away. A good decision as it was not a pleasant thing to watch. Her sons were cowering while she hovered over them forcing them to swim without the tube like my son was doing.

Heart Breaking

It was heartbreaking to watch her two boys trying their best to please the mother and there was nothing they could do that was right. I too could not watch their little faces all dejected and sad anymore. I got my son and his friend out of the pool and went away.

I heard later, that she stood there a long time forcing the kids to try harder till the security came and asked her to leave with her sons. I heard the children were exhausted and crying by the time they came out of the pool. I had never experienced anything like this before. The woman had been pleasant and friendly but I had no idea she could be such a pushy Mum in Dubai.

Why Do it?

The incident left a deep mark on my psyche as well as my son’s. He asked me if I would do the same to him if he failed at something. I hugged him tight and told him that I would love him despite everything. Anyway, there are no failures in life, there are only learning opportunities.

Mum in Dubai: The Food War With Babies

mum in dubai

My Baby Does Not Eat Enough

My Baby Doesn’t Eat Enough

If you are a mum in Dubai like me, you probably have heard a lot of mothers say that “my baby is not eating properly”. For a mum in Dubai, this is a common refrain. I have heard it from practically all my friends who have little babies. We are constantly worrying about the amount of food our babies are consuming. For new and first time mothers it is difficult to gauge how much is enough for the baby. I too was one of those mamas in Dubai who kept saying – “my baby doesn’t eat enough”.

To be fair, I had a genuine reason to do so as my son was and still is, reed thin. Compared to my daughter, who is a nice plump baby, my son looks like he has been starved.

Feed Him To Fatten Him

Moreover, every time I sent a picture of my son back home to my family in Italy, all I heard was he is too thin, feed him properly so he puts on weight. I followed the advice and tried to feed my baby but it all ended in a war of food with me forcing the food and my son refusing to eat beyond a limit. So it carried on till a few months back.

Sound advice on Food and Children

So I was at this party where I bumped into a paediatrician. We got talking and as always happens with Doctors, I asked her advice. I told her that I was worried my son was not eating enough. He was too thin and may be suffering from malnutrition. The paediatrician started laughing and told me that she was used to hearing this from mothers all the time. Then she gave me the best advice on feeding children.

Some children like to eat big meals at set times, while other children prefer to have smaller meals several times a day. They are no different from us adults, children also have their own body rhythms and habits. I did not fully grasp this initially, but then, she went on to explain.

She asked me if my son was dull or not active. The fact is my little one is unstoppable. Both the babysitter in Dubai and I have a hard time keeping up with him. From the moment he opens his eyes till he goes off to sleep, he is a bundle of energy and activity. He is running about jumping, playing and always ready for action. Then I saw what she meant, my son was thin not because he did not eat enough, but because he was such an active baby.

But, I was not done with my doubts, so here came the next advice – never force food down on a child. This will only make the baby resent food. The better thing to do is to put the food in front of the child and then let him choose how much he wants to eat. For the rest of the day, place food, snacks, fruits, etc. within the reach of the child so he can grab what he wants when he wants.

The Best Advice for a Mum in Dubai

No child will stay hungry if there is food within reach. So, I did as was advised and have not been stressed over my baby and his food. I placed food within reach and sure enough, my son started picking up food when he was hungry. I noticed that he preferred small meals several times a day rather than just having three or four big meals.

I do not stress anymore. He is very active and hasn’t put on much weight but, I realise he is an active child who will never have very chubby cheeks. As long as he is active and healthy I am happy. My advice to a mum in Dubai  – the key to preventing a food war is to ensure that the child gets proper nutrition throughout the day.

Get to know more about Mama in Dubai
in your inbox

Subscribe to my mailing list and get interesting news and updates to your email inbox.

Thank you for subscribing.

Something went wrong.